Today is my last day on site but I’m not flying home until tomorrow. I’m sure when I made travel plans, this somehow made sense to me. I’ll be back for a compliance audit next month; actually, I visit this bank four times a year because I like it here. Mainly because of the dark bathroom.
Yesterday I had the following exchange with one of the execs I’m working with this week:
Her: What perfume are you wearing?
Me: Coco Mademoiselle.
Her: I have that. It doesn’t smell like that on me.
Me: … Okay.
First of all, I wouldn’t ridicule my friends on the internet. Subsequently, strangers are my best alternative.
Secondly, it was really more of a shaming than a ridiculing because I can’t expect adults to understand that their behavior is inconsiderate if they are blatantly demonstrating inconsiderate behavior. They are too self-absorbed.
I don’t confront strangers to point out their inconsiderate behavior because, in this case, there were three of them and one of me and, worth noting, I’m not the mother of any of them.
I do this so that people with manners can chuckle at the audacity of these strangers and others may realize that they could be more considerate in the future if they feel entitled to twice what they are socially allotted.
- Soft, store-bought cookies
- People who do not bathe daily so they stink.
- (If you do not bathe daily, you stink)
- Pretend this is #3
- People who use numbered bullets
- Miss Jackson, but only if you’re nasty
- People who forget the point
If you’ve ever talked to your mom on the phone and thought ‘Whoa that was cool, I don’t think she knows I’ve been drinking’ yeah well guess what.
I did not have a good travel day. Well, I did get my upgrade and I sat next to a quiet lady who smelled nice and I didn’t get motion sickness…
Okay. I had a good travel day. It just took forever to get from there to here.
I’m a having a couple Betty Days for my diet. From what I understand, Mikey is hungover and all about a having a couple of Betty Days with me. Stay tuned.
(“Having a Betty Day” is what my friends and I call a day without drinking in honor of Betty Ford and her clinics.)
I like how some of you don’t know who Betty Ford is.
I don’t like how I have no time to think or to fuck or to sleep or to Tumble lately because of work.
Fine. I make time for one of those.